How To Create ‘Yes Spaces’ (Safe Spaces for Your Toddler)

Struggling to create ‘yes spaces’ for your child? Are you tired of saying ‘no’ all day long to your toddler? If you think about it, how many times have you said ‘yes’ to your toddler today?

Toddlerhood (in my humble opinion), is an exciting period of early childhood. They’re in that stage in their lives where they’re mobile enough to go where they want to go, ‘do’ what they want to do, explore and sate their curiosity as far as we allow them to do so. 

This results in a lot of heart-attack-inducing moments, however, when they’re going where they’re NOT supposed to go and explore what could be dangerous or bring harm to others as well. 

So how do we help our toddlers grow and hone their independence without dampening their curious little spirit? 

We create ‘yes spaces’ at our home. 

This essentially means safe places where they can explore and play as freely as they want. So without further ado, let’s dive into some tips for you, dear parent to move on from the ‘no’ to the ‘yes’ for your child. 

1. What you don’t want to be touched, moves out of bounds.

For our little ones, they’re still very much in the absorbent stage. Remember that they’re constantly trying to make sense of literally everything in this world. Even a piece of a notebook can be a source of fascination to them. So they may get a little handsy and just love going through all our stuff as they figure how a certain object moves or functions. 

Hence, one simple mantra I have is that if there’s anything I don’t want my toddler to be touched, needs to be moved to a higher shelf, table, or cabinet. Especially for all the miscellaneous stuff that just adds up to the mess, I’d much rather discard them if I can help it. It’s much easier than having to play tug of war with our toddlers when they can easily grab it.

2. Switch up the delicate furniture to more functional ones.

If we don’t want our toddlers messing up with the fancy and fragile coffee tables, decors, or dealing with the unending crumbs being absorbed by the sofas, rugs, and whatnot, we might consider getting more functional furniture. 

Floors that are easier to clean, sofas that can be easily vacuumed, tablecloths that can be easily washed and look good as new again, these are some considerations in your quest to create more yes spaces in your home. Remember that your relationship with your child is more important than you continuously getting angry at your child over the damage he/she can cost to your furniture. 

Also, who said functional ones can’ be pretty as well? And this stage won’t be forever. You’ll eventually get to upgrade to delicate furniture should you wish to do so again in the future. 

3. Literally, put up a boundary for accident-prone areas.

We can only move so many things out of our toddler’s reach. Switching up our furniture also doesn’t completely stop our toddler’s access to certain parts of our house when they learn how to open doors/cupboards. But wait, maybe this is an opportunity to create ‘yes spaces’ at home.

Hence, one way to look at his is that we might need to develop certain habits in us to prevent our toddler’s access to these accident-prone areas such as: 

• Closing the baby gates always (our family has a baby gate to the kitchen) 
• Turning off the main switches for extension wires
• Keeping these excess wires when done 
• Keeping the bathroom doors close 

4. Put toys into storage what cannot be managed.

For me, the literal A-type mom that can’t stand messes, it’s been difficult to stop myself from saying ‘No’ and chasing after my kid when he just literally flings and throws his toys around. I’ve stuck to the Montessori ‘shelfie’ since he was about 4 months old. But when life gets busy, you tend to dump the toys in a single basket. And then hoping to have that one day to sort through them later on. 

But of course, he would dump those baskets around and cause another mess as he lives a trail of those toys around the house. So to help create more of a ‘yes’ space for my child, I opted to put my kid’s toys in storage bins where he’d need my help to open and access to. I’ve also gradually learned to let go and accept that messes are part of the #toddlerlife and it’s a process of teaching them to clean up for themselves. 

5. Redirect and Reassess.

Whenever my toddler does something I’d normally say ‘No’ to, I’d opt to redirect him to what he can do. Then, I’d reassess the environment why he’s doing/reaching for something he shouldn’t be reaching. Redesigning our home to suit both us adults and our toddler’s growing curiosity is a process that takes gradual observation. 

One method may also work now but may need to be re-assessed later on. As our toddler may become more capable with opening locks, storage bins, and whatnot. But one constant we can do with our children is to redirect them to what they can do. Move them to their ‘yes spaces’, and then rearrange things if needed. Phase-out what doesn’t work as you move forward. 

There you have it, dear parent. Five tips to hopefully lessen the ‘nos’ around your home, and to cater to the ever-growing curiosity of your toddler. 

If you like this post, you might be interested in more toddler content up in the blog:

How To Prevent My Toddler From Throwing Things

How to Prevent the Toddler Tantrums

Ways To Repair With Your Child After Yelling at Them

Remember that when we create ‘yes spaces’, we can gradually move on from repetitively saying no to our toddlers. Cheering for you in this journey we have together, 

Kristine 🌸