How to Prevent the Toddler Tantrums
When the big feelings of our little ones start, it not only rains, it pours. In dealing with our toddler’s tantrums, we just need to let it run its course while validating their feelings. And although toddlers’ tantrums are developmentally normal and healthy, what do we do to prevent these meltdowns?
From one learning parent to another, here are some of the tips that I use to help prevent my toddlers’ tantrums.
1. Address the underlying need and reason for your toddler’s tantrum.
For toddlers (or young children in particular), we ought to shift our mindset from getting them to stop crying to asking ourselves the reason for their tantrums. Remember that our toddler’s tantrums are a way for them to express their feelings. And sometimes, it’s just an unaddressed physiological or emotional need that resulted in going to meltdown city.
Are they hungry? Thirsty? Do they need their diaper changed? Are they overtired? Overstimulated? Have you connected with them? Hence, try to keep to a rhythm of things in the way you schedule their supposed activities. Keep to their maximum wake hours, feeding time, and when going out, take into consideration the travel and prep time as well.
2. Teach your toddler to communicate.
One of the main reasons why our toddlers break down into an emotional mess is simply because they don’t have the words to communicate their wants. Especially when they’re pre-verbal. And although we can never force your child to begin talking, we can encourage them to find other ways to communicate their needs.
One way is through sign language, another is through keeping handy pictures of the things they’d most likely need (such as potty, milk, water, snack). Another helpful tip is to focus on functional words (such as up, down, more, stop), rather than the colors or ABCs. Hopefully, this would be enough to help them communicate better and prevent the toddler’s tantrums.
You might be interested in checking out @speechsisters IG account if you want some helpful speech intervention tips for your little ones.
3. Set up your environment for success.
What better way to stop the toddler’s tantrums and frustrations but to set up your toddler’s environment so that he can meet his needs on his own? Remember that you’re also an important part of your child’s environment so modify and switch things up at your home in ways that would work best for your family.
In essence, you don’t need to buy everything child size, but maybe you can have a corner for your child to have access to his own snacks or water. Baby proof the things you don’t want them to touch, or move those things to a higher place. And as much as possible, try to give them access to things that could encourage their independence.
4. Give your toddler their dosage of choices and independence
Our toddlers’ brains are always craving to exert their independence. And when they’re constantly being said no to all day long, this would naturally result in them being frustrated. Hence, voila, even the littlest thing could set them off and head off to meltdown city.
Thus, create opportunities to say yes to them rather than no. Throughout the day, highlight and thank them for the things they’ve done right. Invite them to do the things that tend to pique their interest. This would most likely be your household chores, but if you have the time and patience, let them observe and participate in the things that you do.
For our kids in particular, sometimes it’s more of the connection with you that they crave more than the activity.
5. Prep them up for transitions.
Our toddlers’ tantrums and meltdowns can also be translated into something akin to,” Why did you suddenly change/stop what I was doing?” Especially when they’re something more interesting (such as screen times, playgrounds, etc.), transitioning them to prepare for dinner or to go home would often result in tantrums and pushbacks.
For our toddlers, giving them a heads up and giving them a choice in their transition would often work wonders. This could look like, “We’re about to go home dear, choose one more activity in the playground before we go,” or “We’re about to have dinner, honey, choose one last song to watch”. Avoid ending your statements in a question, and stick to your words.
That way, you won’t fall into a trap of negotiating too much with your toddler, or them saying no to your questions.
And that is it, dear parent. Hopefully, these tips help prevent those toddler pushbacks. But take heart if they don’t work, there’s nothing wrong with your toddler or you. These are merely tools that you can whip up from time to time, and use what works best for you and your family.
If you need more tips and tricks for dealing with your toddlers’ big feelings, you might be interested to read some of my other blog posts on this topic:
How To Deal With Pushbacks After School
How to Set Boundaries for Your Child’s Screen Time
Cheering for you dear parent in this parenting journey we have together!
Kristine
